I am the High Queen of Staticland. My reign is supreme and none doubt My superiority. Even so, I will generously give you proof of My staticness:
1. My hair is like Drew Barrymore a la Firestarter
2. I zap (Zap! Not shock. Zap!) everyone I deign to touch.
3. My clothes look like I have a full velcro bodysuit underneath and I've been in some unfortunate positions, hence, the clothing weirdness/cling.
4. My lineage is from a proud family of static-prone peoples.
All hail the Queen! Long live the Queen!
Her High Royal Highness Elizabeth of Staticland